Senior Thesis

I squat in the tub, porcelain cold against my thighs
The drain plugged up
(Waste not, Want not)
pills sloshing in my stomach from
one, two, three hours before
The fourth time in so many months

The camera set up
perfectly angled to capture my performance
(Let them get an eyeful)
The cramps will be painful
shockingly so
The blood doesn’t bother me
anymore

I sweat and cringe like they expect
It’s much easier in the dark
(My eager Fabricators)
I grit my teeth, imagining blue eyes
a scruffy beard
at least
I think this one was his

Slip proof mat under my feet:
I am Janet Leigh
(No, you’re a Psycho)
the least of what they’ll say
when they see
the pieces of me staring back
beneath layers and layers
of slick cellophane

So much paint on a pulsing canvas
my other cherubs
chilling in the fridge
Patient contributions
To my final statement
(and my Final Grade)

It’s going to be
one hell of a show